20 Questions with Jos and Jon

Sara did this on her blog and invited us to play along:

1.What is something your mom always says to you?
Josie: JOSIE! (That, usually followed by PUT YOUR PANTS ON!)
Jon: Don't eat because we are almost having dinner.

2. What makes your mom happy?
Josie: When I listen to her.
Jon: When I don't spill things.

3. What makes your mom mad?
Josie: When I don't listen.
Jon: When I leave something out and then Tommy makes a mess with it. (Like the Sharpie??)

4. How does your mom make you laugh?
Josie: By being funny.
Jon: When she gets hurt and then Tommy says sorry in a really cute way. (More how Tommy makes him laugh, I'd say.)

5. What was you mom like as a child?
Josie: Tomboy. (Totally inaccurate.)
Jon: She was cute and pretty playful. (Well?)

6. How old is your mom?
Josie: 63.
Jon: How old is she, anyway? I think she is 33. (37, but bless you Jon.)

7. How tall is your mom?
Josie: 4 feet.
Jon: Like 60 1/2 feet. (It's that last half foot. So hard to find pants that fit.)

8. What is your mom's favorite thing to do?
Josie: Spend time with me!
Jon: Doing the dishes. (Obviously.)

9. What does your mom do when you are not around?
Josie: Watch movies when I am in bed.
Jon: She dates or goes to the store. (By dating, I'm sure he means dating PIE.)

10. Your mom is famous for:
Josie: A website. (Blog? I don't have a website.)
Jon: Cleaning up the house.

11. What is your mom really good at?
Josie: Printing. (We do stress penmanship in this house.)
Jon: Cleaning up the house.

12. What is your mom NOT really good at?
Josie: Building a house. (I actually think I am better at building than decorating.)
Jon: She's not too good at agreeing with Dad. (Is it that obvious?)

13. What does your mom do for her job?
Josie: Take care of us.
Jon: Cleans up the house.

14. What is your mom's favorite food?
Josie: Rice.
Jon: I think, like, Chinese food. (Both of these things I like...but no mention of baked goods?)

15. If your mom could be an animal, what would she be?
Josie: A skunk. (So complimentary, that girl.)
Jon: A monkey.

16. What do you and your mom do together?
Josie: Play Pet Shops.
Jon: Sometimes when everyone is gone we go to a restaurant. (The boy is dreaming here.)

17. What makes you proud of your mom?
Josie: Letting me have 50 Pet Shops. (Also a dream.)
Jon: Buying food for us.

18. How are you and your mom the same?
Josie: Starts with J, ends with ie.
Jon: We look a lot a like except for the long hair.

19. How are you and your mom different?
Josie: I don't like hamburgers and she does. (I don't hate them, but don't love them either.)
Jon: She is bigger than me.

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
Josie: She takes care of me.
Jon: Because I look cute.

Day 7

For those of you who wish this long trial of day-by-day, milkshake-by-milkshake recounting of our family road trip would mercifully come to an end (me, for one).... here it is, the last day of our recent trip to California...

Sunday dawned and about 3 hours later we realized it. We were staying in our friend's windowless basement and had no idea what time it was. We got on the road about 9:30 am and knew that leaving so late, we would be fighting the mountain traffic later on that evening. St. George to Denver is about 10 hours. Ten long, punishing hours. The trip is over. The fun has been had. We were on our way back home to lots of laundry and shopping for school supplies for the three middles. (Calvin, Josie and Jon started school 2 days after we got home.)

After days and days of nothing but fast food, I begged Pie to stop at Arby's for lunch. Not exactly Grandma's kitchen, but at least I could order a sandwich that looked like...a sandwich. The children cried. This is what happens when you drag 5 children around the Western United States for 7 days in the summer. They lose it when you ask them to order something so outrageous as...not chicken nuggets. And then after we ordered our food and the kids were still crying and the woman said "That will be $29.67 please" and we had only each ordered one thing for lunch and no drinks....Pie cried. But I stuck to my convictions and happily ate my $6 sandwich. Because why is it always the mom that has to suffer? I say, share the wealth!

We were through the Eisenhower tunnel by 6 pm, officially the You've-Only-Got-90-More-Minutes-Till-Home marker, when we got stuck in the 4th of July weekend traffic jam we knew we would. And then it started pouring rain. And we were in stop and go traffic for an hour. (Which is what you really hope for in a 10 hour trip. That superfluous 11th hour.) And Jon kept throwing up. Well, not really throwing up, but making a valiant effort. Lots and lots of graphic barfing noises. I gave him an empty chip bag and told him to keep his face in it. Luckily for me he never actually threw up, because that kind of thing spreads like wildfire in a car full of children and husband. Naturally, I am immune...

Well, we did it. We spent 2 days each way in transit and only 3 days actually there, but we drove to California and back in July and nothing bad happened. Our Suburban behaved better than our children, even if it was more expensive to fill, and we were able to complete many important tastings on our "Tour of Milkshakes of the West":

Sonic=Best.
In N Out=Honorable Mention.
Wendy's=Respectable.
Carl's Jr=Only better than NOT having a milkshake, but definitely the worst of the bunch.

We have planned another adventure out to Zion for Fall break. That should give us all enough time in therapy before we head out again.

Day 6

Can you tell even I am getting bored with chronicling this trip?

So Day 6 begins with bathing the children. Day 5 ended with the fireworks carbon shower, and us putting our little charcoal encrusted children to bed straight from the party, fully dressed and filthy. They all fell asleep in the car and we just plunked them down on their bed.

A note about our sleeping arrangements: I'm sure you are all dying to know how
we managed to fit 7 people in one hotel room (2 queen beds) every night. Well,
it is a fascinating lesson in organization and provident living, so I
don't blame your inquisitiveness...
Tommy sleeps in a pack-n-play, diagonally. He is too big for the thing but has to go somewhere. Some of our hotel rooms were so tiny, the pack-n-play barely fit between the two beds. Pie and I sleep in one bed and the four big kids get the other. I strip the bed (except for the fitted sheet) and shove it up against the wall. Then I line the kids up crosswise in the bed in this order from top to bottom: Josie, Calvin,
Jon and Sid. Order is important. Certain children must be used as buffers in
between certain other children. Hint: Calvin and Jon are buffer children.

So back to hosing the kids down...
After we ate our muffins and got the fireworks off the children, we headed out to see Grandma Pedersen at her rest home. She looks amazing and is sharp as a tack and doesn't seem to miss that hip one bit. It was fun to watch her watch the kids. After saying goodbye, we headed to the cheapest gas we could find ($4.37 a gallon!) and then over to Smith's Bakery for some much anticipated smiley faced sugar cookies. Can you believe it, they were closed for the holiday weekend! They are my favorite cookie and taste like memories. Mommy was seriously disappointed. I then promised the kids that we would get donuts later on. Because I believe being a good mother means ensuring delicious baked goods are provided, no matter what. We headed out of town on our way to St. George, our stop for the evening.

(these are the very cookies)

Lunch was in scenic Barstow, at a very over-priced and unsatisfactory Popeye's Chicken. Lessons learned. On our way out of town I spied a donut drive thru (we heart drive-thru's)...attached to a Chinese takeout. Donuts and Chinese food are a natural pairing, and I am surprised that our great land doesn't have more of these little shops. We ordered a lot of donut holes and fully fashioned donuts. We ate them until we were sick of them, and then kept going until we had finished them off. I'm always telling the children it is important to stick with a task until it is done. (We may not be in the mood for more donuts for quite a while.)

We made it to St. George and Dave and Becky's house. We swam in their gorgeous pool and ate their delicious dinner and wished we could move right then to St. George. The night was perfect for sitting out by the pool and watching the kids swim. The red rocks are beautiful and the houses are all ranches (my favorite!) We won't be able to move there for years, but we will be missing it. I want to live in Tuacahn!

(after publishing this post I want to tear my hair out. My formatting, which is never brilliant, is a total mess on this one. Argh!)

Yo, Adrienne

Look to the right. There, at the top of the list of "blogs I'm always checking" is the link to your blog. Adrienne and Derek (if that is indeed how your names are spelled). A link right to you. Special-like. But you know what happens when I click on that link? A curt little message tells me I have NOT YET BEEN INVITED to view this blog. Apparently there is a party going on, and no one invited me. Well Lundberg, I'm officially inviting you to meet me at the bike racks after school. Prepare for your roughing-up. I'm older, craftier, (at least I assume I am. I did make my own wedding dress, you know. And without the aid of a stapler.) and obviously I've got the weight advantage. Kansas ain't too far of a drive for me! I've got a new Rand-McNally road atlas!

Please. Please let me come and play.

Love,
Julie

Day 5

Friday was a little rough at the beginning. If it had been for any less noble cause than going to see my Nana's 80th birthday party, I don't believe I could have convinced Pie to swap the beach house for Bakersfield. As it was, I think he wanted to shed a tear as we pulled out of the neighborhood (during a 4th of July Fun Run, which sent Pie further over the edge--the man loves Fun Runs) and headed up the 5 towards the great San Joaquin Valley. Poor Bakersfield. It is the punch line of so many jokes. My own father has always lovingly referred to it as the armpit of California, and he was born there. So was I. I have fond memories of frequent visits as a child. Most of my relatives still live there. Summers are brutally hot, and never seem to cool down at night. Fall and Winter are rainy, and of course foggy. Ahh, that fog. As children we didn't have snow days, but we made up for that with a superabundance of fog. Fog so thick you couldn't see more than a foot or two in front of your own face. Fog you could play hide and seek in. I never had curly hair but I can imagine the curses that were hurled heavenward by all those who did. Poor poodle heads. So, as much as I love Bakersfield for nostalgic reasons, I fully recognize the fact that it ain't exactly gonna show up at the top of many people's list of "Places I'd love to spend the 4th of July".

We pulled into town at 11. It was already hot, low 90's. We decided to stop at the Frosty King for lunch, because it sounded so refreshing. Plus it had a covered drive-thru, something one takes into consideration under the circumstances. I personally have never seen such an extensive menu for a fast food joint. I'm talking "Cheesecake Factory novel-like menu" extensive. Corn dogs, BLT's, Tacos, Fish Tacos, Falafel, Philly Cheese Steak, Donuts, Onion Rings, Nuggets, Cobb Salad, Omelets. Omelets!!! A ridiculous number of items. Certainly none of our children could complain that we stopped somewhere that didn't have what they wanted. (So instead they complained that the food was too hot.) And surprisingly, it wasn't the worst fast food we had on our trip. That dubious title goes to Jack in the Box. We took our lunch to Uncle Kurt and Aunt Terrie's back yard and swam with all the cousins. It was perfect, with plenty of shade to keep our poor little Pie out of the sun. He couldn't swim because his burn was still so bad that even applying sunscreen to it would have been torture. (I'm still unclear on how he could possibly have been burned so completely. Maybe it had something to do with chasing Tommy through the sand for all those hours, while I stayed in a hoodie under the umbrella.)

Then it was on to the church for a little (air conditioned) lunch and talent program--the twins told jokes to each other. Everyone politely laughed. After that it was to Uncle Craigs front lawn to watch fireworks. Kirsten has done a fantastic job of recounting the activities of Old Nana's birthday on her own blog, complete with lots of pictures. I highly recommend checking it out. Because I am just too lazy and I have no intention of redoing it here. I will however add that Bakersfield totally redeemed itself, in Pie's opinion, by putting on a crazy fireworks show, the details of which will be getting the full treatment soon on my other blog. For me, Bakersfield redeemed itself by NOT swinging into the triple digits for our party. I think the high was a very well-received 97 degrees. Downright pleasant.

This is a picture of me and my cousin Adrienne. We can't stand each other. And cousin Ben sitting next to Adrienne isn't fond of either one of us.

Ha Ha. Just kidding!

We loved seeing all the cousins, aunts and uncles and of course, Old Nana (a name which Sid gave her at the age of three and she finds absolutely agreeable, by the way). We missed Aunt Susie and Uncle Ove's breakfast and Aunt Barbara too (sad face), but we hope to see them February 2010, our next planned trip to see Mickey. Anyway, Bakersfield turned out to be a pretty fun place to spend the 4th of July she said, pleasantly surprised.

Day 4, part 2

Before we begin with part 2, let me be very clear. I do not enjoy getting my picture taken. I find it even less enjoyable to look at pictures that were taken of me. And even greatly less pleasurable than that do I like posting numerous pictures of myself at the beach, in unflattering beachy attire, on my blog for all of blogdom to look upon. But you see, I am in a tight spot here. Since I took NO pictures, save one, of our time with the Everloves at Leo, I had to ask Apryl to email hers to me. She is a bit of a shutterbug, and to make matters worse, I seem to be her muse. And to make matters worser, she spent about 4 hours last night (only somewhat resentfully) sending me loads of pictures. Bless her heart, she is not overly qualified to be sending things via email. I am not either, which is why I feel free to mock her about it. ANYWAY, I feel more than obligated to put lots of her pictures onto this post. I figure most of you will get some sort of wicked enjoyment out of these shots (Kelly...I am looking in your direction) and so here they are, in all their glory.....
Josie and Maddie. Leave it to Maddie to make Josie look tall.

Ahhh, one of those pictures I love. I think my hair and glasses and posture ever so slightly hint of Ozzy Osbourne in this one. That is Pie wiping out on the wave behind us. Not really.

I actually like this one. It is sort of my Baywatch moment, as I emerge from the rocks holding Tommy. If Baywatch had a more "non-busty woman lacking a tan, in water shoes and shorts from the Jr. department at Wal-Mart" kinda vibe. I'm thinking Baywatch-meets-Ugly Betty. But with less poncho, of course.

I don't know that this one of Sam and Tommy even needs a caption. Also one of my faves.

I see a career for us in modelling, when L.L. Bean goes waaaay down market.

It was a rather spell-binding shell. Really. It was.

Pie is no more modest than John and would doubtless be shirtless if he wasn't burned to a crisp.

You can see the agony here on Josie's face. She is having one miserable time.

Another child subjected to the torture of spending an afternoon at this beach. Shameful.

What happens next I believe I more than adequately described in my post on my black blog, Horrible, Horrible Mother. So I shan't regale you again with that old chestnut. But what happened after that was we all drove up to Ventura to have dinner. Because John knows every place (and person!) in the whole Conejo Valley, he took us to the perfect place for dinner. Seven very beach-weary children and 4 very children-weary parents tucked in to a rather chaotic yet delicious meal of something not fast food, namely pizza. Yay for John!

After that we made our way at sundown to the condo. We all stood out watching the waves for a long time. Maddie and Josie collected some truly lovely seagull feathers that had spent a goodly amount of time "off the bird", apparently. We carefully shoved them back under the sand every time the girls had their backs turned. The whole day we kept marveling at how great all the children got along, and it was nice to just sit back and watch the kids make their own fun. Sometimes more kids=less work. It was a great day, even though my children will probably be forever scarred by our barbarous treatment of them, making them spend all those hours at that stupid Leo Carrillo.

Day 4, part 1

So Thursday we didn't get up early. We took our sweet time getting out and about so by the time we got to the grocery for our food for the day and then on to our first stop (Evenstar park) it was 10:30 and HOT. Poor Pie had sunburned his stomach and the tops of his feet so badly at Zuma that sitting out in the heat, even under a big shady tree, was misery. The park had really nice play equipment but since it was so hot and sunny we only stayed a little while. You can see in the picture of Tommy on the slide that his cheeks are all rosy.

After we left the park we went to visit Michelle and Ken. We haven't seen them since Sid was almost 3, so we had lots to catch up on. They are exactly the same. They are so fun to hang out with. Super cool and mellow, with lots of funny stories to share. Our kids were horrified to learn we would NOT be swimming in their backyard pool (Thursday turned out to be the only day we didn't swim in a pool, so we told them to quit their crying). We LOVED their house and for me this trip was a little hard because it was the first time in a long time that I found myself really missing Cali. I love Colorado and we are here at least until 2020--I like to say I am happily stuck. But being back in beautiful Westlake/Thousand Oaks/Agoura, I realized how Colorado really is a highland desert (read: mostly dry, open land with only the occasional pine tree. I am so over pine trees.) . And don't even get me started on our complete lack of beach......

After leaving the Daurio's, we headed to the Carl's Jr. in Westlake to enjoy yet another fast food feast. While there, we ran into Barbara Lang. What a happy surprise! I worked for her for years, cleaning her house, wrapping Christmas presents for her grandkids and just generally chit-chatting our way through many an afternoon. And what luck! Her beach house was going to be empty for the next few days and we just happen to adore her beach house. It took us about zero seconds to decide to ditch our Calabasas motel for our own beach front condo. Thanks, Barbara!

It was mid afternoon before we were all packed an out of our Good Nite Inn and on our way to Leo Carrillo, following behind the Everloves. John and Apryl had taken the afternoon and evening off from their crazy Rock and Roll lifestyles to hang out with us. Things were looking pretty good, but our kids were already starting to turn on us during the drive to the beach, complaining that they wanted to go back to Zuma. I suppose this should have been our first hint. But we naively thought, "What kids wouldn't love hunting for starfish and hermit crabs amongst the rocks of Leo?" Our kids, it turned out. (Stay tuned for the next gripping instalment of our family trip to California. Otherwise known as Day 4, part 2.)