Things You Should Know About Sid

Today was Sid's 13 birthday. He got to go out to eat for lunch with Dad, and that was it. Because way back in the summer, he begged and begged and begged to purchase his best friend's bass guitar and amp he (the best friend) was selling. It was quite the deal, but at $250 we told him it would have to be his Christmas and Birthday present all in one. We made him wait a month to be sure that he was willing to accept a gift-free holiday. He was sure. Until about October. Since then he has pretty much regretted his decision, even though he really likes the bass. He would just have really liked some gifts as well. I tell you what, though, it did make my life easier this Christmas. Lots of conversations about why we refuse to buy him an iTouch didn't even happen. He did get a brownie cake (his choice) with 13 candles to blow out--although the minute we finished singing "toooooo yoooooo" Tommy jumped in and blew out at least 7 candles before Sid even had a chance.

Sid, dreaming of a better birthday next year?

Admiring the odds-and-ends candles I managed to scrounge up. I am never ready for this kid's birthday, two days after Christmas.

So, a few things you should know about Sid:

It is his life's mission to grow his hair out "long" and shiny and dark, just like Drake's. To which dream I say Good luck. (In an effort to make his hair shinier he conditions it daily, and in an effort to make it grow he eats eggs every day. You know, protein.)

Sid has super flexible ears. He can fold them up and shove them inside his ear canal and they will stay. It has been a long-cherished dream of mine that someday Sid will appear on Stupid Human Tricks.

(Please enjoy this very short video of Sid performing his ear trick. I had to pay him $5 for the rights to this video. Dang kids. They are on to me. The very minute I casually mentioned to Sid this evening that I would like to video his trick, he instantly became combative and made me promise I wouldn't post it on my blog. Lucky for you, the boy has a price. And lucky for me, that price is only $5.)

Sid recently began skateboarding and gave up basketball, two things that cause his father to twitch.

Sid loves video games. A very empathetic grandfather overcompensated this Christmas and bought him a racing game that comes with a steering wheel. Sid has been in the basement racing ever since.

Sid is still a snuggle bug. Just don't tell him I told you.

A Celtic Celebration

Sometimes a twin is just the thing, when you want to dance a Christmas jig (or in this case, Tom Billy's Jig). An empty dining room with a slick wood floor also helps. Halfway through the video you can hear Tommy shout "They're dancing!" before he shows up to twirl in....surprise!..nothing but a diaper. Calvin also joins in for just a moment--watch for my disapproving head shake to make it's way to the camera--and then both Tommy and Calvin are gone. Just Josie and Jon jigging about in questionable attire. (Yes, those are Mardi Gras beads on Jon, worn in a jaunty fashion.)

Because We Are Excited For The Frosting And The Sprinkles!

(In the following post about the kids I teach at church, I have included pictures but taken out the names. Hope all you parents are okay with this, because your kids are just too cute to not post these pictures.)

My class on January 6 of this year. B and H were ripped from me in the summer (some sort of pish-posh about classroom overcrowding and adding a new teacher) and then of course we are missing C--who didn't move in until later--but here were are, snuggled up on a dowdy foyer couch.

For the past two years I have been teaching the 5 year olds in Primary. They are adorable. I have always loved serving in Primary, but I think I may have found my ideal age group in the 5's. They are sweet. They are funny. They fight over who gets to sit on my lap during sharing time.

A few months ago C, one of my peeps--and the boy with possibly the most gorgeous crystal blue eyes I have ever seen--came over to make cookies with me. It was so fun that I decided that the rest of the class would have to join in. So this morning the other two boys in the class came over. And then after lunch it was the three girls.


The original cookie party, just me and C and enough colored sprinkles for a few hundred cookies. Here is C, vacuuming up sprinkles. Way to put your back into it son!

This is M. He is really laid back. M is a realist, just like me. He once told me he doesn't like cats or dogs because of the hair and the slobber. I know just how you feel, M.

This is M. He's huge. I think someday he'll have a career as a pro wrestler. Or a Navy SEAL. He loves to sit on my lap. He plays with my hair and hugs me and tells me I smell good. M does wonderful things for a girl's self esteem.

And now for the girls! N, S and A decorating their cookies. After we had baked the cookies but before we decorated them, the girls and Josie were running around and squealing, in that way girls do, and I told them NO MORE SQUEALING (but in a really fun way because, hey, I'm a fun teacher) when S said "But we are just so excited about the frosting and the sprinkles!!!" Me too, S. Why do you think I make these cookies anyway?

It wouldn't be a party at my house if it didn't involve a little toddler nudity.

Miss N. The cutest helium voice you have ever heard. And this girl knows her stuff. Stamped out her cookies on her own. Frosted them herself (and sprinkled them unassisted) in no time flat! Her mother would probably like for me to explain to you at this point that she is wearing her pajamas to our cookie party because it was pajama day at school. But I told her mom, the only reason I wasn't wearing my pajamas is because I showered before the party, so, you know, I figured I'd just get dressed.


Cutie-patootie S. She spent all last Sunday's class talking with a South'n accent. Just about the funniest 5 year old on the planet. You cannot see it, but frosting all OVER that shirt. (Plus adorable stripey tights, also frosted.)


Miss A. She arrived with a little chocolate treat for me and the other girls and also brought her lip gloss--something she always has on hand. A is the little sister to two older brothers and the big sister to GGB triplets. She colors handouts in class and decorates cookies with the same attention to detail. She is not interested in slapping some sprinkles on and calling it done, let me tell you. I helped her decorate some of her cookies, because by the time she finished frosting each cookie, the icing had hardened to the point where the sprinkles wouldn't stick. But check out her perfect cookies!

Last Sunday I was given the list for next year's class. Five little 5's, all girls. I have already dubbed them "My Little Ladies".

Glitter Glue, Sequins and other Spangly Things

Last year we decorated cheap-o Jo Ann felt stockings. So naturally the kids were clamoring for more of the same this year. A snowy Sunday afternoon seemed to be the perfect time to drag out bowls full of buttons, sequins, beads and glitter glue. Usually I'm not the first to suggest such outlandishly messy crafts, but what can I say? I guess this is what's meant by the phrase "getting into the Christmas spirit". Well, it was fun. And now I've got a kitchen floor covered in Christmas spirit.

Getting ready: Jos, Jon and Calvin can't wait for the party to begin. See if you can spy Pie trying to nap in the background!

At the table, the mood is joyful and triumphant.

So check out Tommy's wee stocking. He was all about the glitter glue and the beads...

....and a little decorative technique called "button stacking".

We really did have a nice afternoon. Nobody teased. Nobody cried. And Jonny only laugh/peed once. This activity was fun for all, but appealed to the 7 year olds the most. Josie and Jon were still decorating long after the rest of us moved on with our lives.

**Thanks Wayne and Becky for sending the storm our way!!! It snowed this morning but the real story is the cold-- currently at 3:30 in the afternoon, it is 2 degrees outside.

A Christmas Elf. Or Clown (It Doesn't Matter)

Today I made good on a Christmas Promise I made to Jos a few weeks ago. And if we have learned anything from repeated screenings of Merry Christmas Drake and Josh, it is that a Christmas Promise can't be broken. So, this promise I made. Let me long-windedly set the stage for you:

A few weeks ago we are driving to gymnastics, me and Jos. Things are good. And then suddenly--without warning--Josie is tearfully trudging us both down memory lane, remembering a particular penguin ornament ($1 at the grocery) that she dearly loved two years ago. (She dearly loved it so much that even though I had repeatedly instructed her to not touch that ornament, one day she took it with her to the potty and and promptly dropped it onto the tile floor. Clearly she has never recovered from this shattering emotional moment.) Hoping to calm her down I used the "I know just how you feel" technique and told her about this sweet Christmas Elf ornament we had as a kid. Sadly for the ornament, many parts of his colorful little body were made up of Lifesavers. I must have been around 6 one Christmas (certainly old enough to know better) when I decided the best thing to do would be to eat that little elf's arms and legs. I can't really remember but I'm sure it was delicious--being several years old and all. And when I was done eating all the Lifesavers, I realized that I had ruined the ornament. Oh sob! Oh cry!

So I bet you all know what happened when I finished this story for Jos. She became completely hysterical. Not only was she sad about the ornament she had destroyed, she was sad about my ornament too. Dang, I'm good. So here is where the Christmas Promise comes in: I told her that when she was off track we would make new Elf ornaments. (I did NOT tell her that the grocery store quit selling those penguin ornaments.)

So today, after many false starts and trips to the grocery to find the Lifesavers, voila! Our Elf ornaments. (If you think these elves look a lot like clowns, you are not alone. But it's hard to actualize a craft that you only have a 6 year old's memory of.) I made a prototype for Tommy to eat:

Looking like the elf (Shoot! I meant to put pants on that kid!)

Stringing up the wooden bead heads and the Lifesaver arms and legs. For obvious reasons, Tommy was given the special needs project, which was: stringing wooden beads onto yarn while screaming I CAN'T DO IT!! (even though obviously he can). Sometimes 3 year olds can be really immature.

Calvin and Jon working reverently and quietly.

An elf in progress. I think I am putting up too many pictures. Am I putting up too many pictures? Because it feels like too much.

My elf on the left and Josie's on the right. She did her own face. I like her face better than mine. But then I also like Josie's face better than my own face, so I guess this shouldn't be surprising.

Jon's elf. Kirsten, please do not make any sniggering remarks about the nose Jon drew. That's just the way he draws them, and you know it.

Calvin's elf. Calvin went a little heavy on the wooden beads. But I told him it's not wrong, it's just very very different.

After we made the elf ornaments we all had hot dogs for lunch. It was a party!

Oh Calvin, My Calvin

Poor, sweet, cooperative, pleasant Calvin. So quiet, so not needy, so easily given the short shrift here on the blog. Today my intent is to introduce you more fully to this skinny little guy--kid #2, bookworm and picky eater.

Here is Calvin in all his epidermal glory. Calvin used to be a chubby baby and toddler. But now he is rather skinny. Sometimes this really worries me. This picture was taken after a big meal, and oddly enough, on a day we didn't go swimming.


See what I mean? Hey Calvin, Victoria Beckham called and wants her collar bones and rib cage back.


Sometimes I think Calvin is so skinny because he is a picky eater. But he's a nice picky eater. And by that I mean if he doesn't like what I'm cooking, he generally just looks sad and skulks away. Not like Josie. She is a mean picky eater. She tells me dinner smells and she hates it in no uncertain terms and then demands something more to her liking. If I have a choice, I'm going to love the nice picky eater over the mean one.

Calvin has big ears. Which is why that second monkey on my blog banner is meant to be Calvin, because that monkey has big ears too. One really nice thing about Calvin is, he seems to really like his ears. It makes things easier for everybody, I think.

Calvin loves to read. Sometimes I make fun of him for reading books like Nancy Drew, but really, the kid is still in 4th grade and he has read every book he can get his hands on. He's kind of running out of age-appropriate options. But still, it's fun to tease him.

Calvin really enjoys stupid jokes. Sometimes we crack ourselves up telling stupid jokes to each other. We pretend they are really hilarious and witty. This drives Sid nuts, which naturally leads to more enjoyment on our part. There may be nothing funnier than making Sid crazy, as we pretend our dumb jokes are comic genius. If there is something more funny out there, we sure haven't found it.

Calvin is a really nice kid. More than a few parents have mentioned to me they would be more than happy to take him, in the event of something horrible and unmentionable happening to me and Pie. Please note that no such kind offers have ever come in relating to any of my other children. That says something, right? So no, Calvin doesn't cut his own hair or chase the girls or embarrass me publicly. But I'm okay with that.

It's Cookie Weather

What we've got planned for today:

We are off track (yet again) and bored but not quite ready for our regimented Cookin School, Art School and the like, tentatively planned for next week. And when I say we are bored I mean Josie is bored. The rest of us quite enjoy having nothing on the agenda. The weather is supposed to turn snowy today, an eventuality here in Colorado that I like to prepare for by having on hand all the necessary supplies for cookies. Outside it is a chilly 27 and the sky is the exact shade of grey you'll find in the lint collector. Inside the children have just provided their own lunch, an improvised affair consisting of Lucky Charms and milk served up in small Tupperware containers, ladled to the mouth with actual ladles. (Perhaps in addition to cookie baking I can see about whipping up a batch of doing the dishes.)

So Josie, chocolate chip cookies will have to satisfy your urge for excitement. I plan on being satisfied with well over a dozen cookies, just myself. I am more than willing to make cookies every day, if that is what it takes to entertain these kids. Oh, the sacrifices I am willing to endure for my children. But with 5 1/2 weeks off from school from November 26 to January 5, I guess I should be grateful that most days the kids are content with just tearing apart the basement building forts, turning the Christmas tree lights on and off repeatedly, and preventing the couch cushions from ever fulfilling their intended purpose.